Category: Writing Page 14 of 17

Recently, I received some very constructive criticism from my editor. The central problem she experienced with the first few chapters of my novel was difficulty liking/identifying with one of the protagonists.

The novel has two protagonists – one male, one female. During beta reader feedback, readers told me multiple times how much they liked the female protagonist. None of them complained about the male protagonist, but they didn’t have much to say about him, either. Combine that with the editor’s feedback, and I clearly have an issue. 

I already have a plan outlined for dealing with this issue, and might write more about that later. But this blog post is concerned with something different: the writing process that led to this issue.

I’ve always been fascinated by the writing process. That’s why I’ve always loved Christopher Tolkien’s History of Middle-Earth volumes that showed his father’s decades-long process for writing The Lord of the Rings and his other books. I also read and listen to numerous blogs and podcasts about writing. In this case, to my delight, I was able to study myself and learn from my own process.

When I began this novel, I had an overarching basic plot in mind, and a fairly specific plot arc related to the male protagonist. I knew exactly where he needed to be at different points in the book and where he would end up and so on. 

But the female protagonist was still somewhat of a mystery to me. I had a vague idea of what would happen with her, but very few specifics. Her side of the story would ultimately come more from discovery writing. Her story did come to me as I was writing, more and more as the process developed. (See, for example, this blog post.)

(As an aside, for my non-writer readers, “discovery writing” could also be called seat-of-the-pants or “pantser” style writing, where the writer “discovers” the story while actually writing it. This is generally considered the opposite of “plotter” style writing, where the writer has a definite outlined plot before actually beginning to write. Both of these are wide designations, with much cross-over.)

It’s not so much the plot in question here, however. It’s the actual characters. Readers have no trouble identifying with and loving the female protagonist, but they seem to have difficulty with the male protagonist’s character (or lack thereof). 

Does this mean I shouldn’t ever outline again and write everything by the seat of my pants? Probably not. Does it mean my discovery writing is stronger than my plotted writing? Maybe.

More than that, I think the primary writing lesson I can learn from this is: Be careful not to be so locked into the plot that you forget the actual characters. In my focus on moving the male protagonist from plot point A to plot point B and so on, I failed to make him an engaging character on his own.

Considering how much junk I put this guy through, it’s kind of important that people care about him…

Over the past two years, I have been embarked on a voyage to publication. It’s been a voyage of discovery, of learning and excitement. Unfortunately, it’s also been a voyage of disillusionment and rejection, and I’ve grown tired of it. I’m now mostly convinced that it’s time for the voyage to swerve in a different direction.
During this time, I have written two books, a YA fantasy/sci-fi hybrid, and an adult epic fantasy. I’m proud of both of them, and my readers so far seem impressed. Both have series potential.
But this has not translated to any type of success in the traditional publishing realm. Between the two books, I have now received over one hundred rejections from literary agents. Of those one hundred, NINETY-FIVE were nothing more than form letters. Four had a couple of extra sentences added. One, just a month ago, requested a partial manuscript, then rejected it two days later. None of them offered any real advice for improvement. None offered any solid reasons for the rejection beyond vague subjective things like the standard “I’m not the right fit for this one.”
Do I believe the books could be improved? Absolutely. In fact, virtually all books could be improved, even after publication. But lacking any substantive advice, I have no basis for tampering further with my books. However, I am beginning to work with an editor, so we’ll see what comes of that.
I have followed all the rules. Every week, I see a new article from an agent with a list of “what not to do” or something like that. Since my earliest attempts at querying, none of those lists have applied to me. I’ve done nothing on any of their lists that would immediately lead to rejection. I’ve even kept my public social media banal and avoided any subject matter (politics, etc.) that would offend anyone at all.
Is it the subject matter of the books themselves? One agent did hint on my first book that it seemed dystopian and the market had become pretty full of that lately. That’s fair, I suppose, but it’s not really a dystopian novel. And that’s not the issue with the epic fantasy, but it’s been rejected in the same way, from many of the same agents.
I have three choices:

1. Give up. Abandon writing.
2. Set yet another book aside. Write another new one and start the process all over again.
3. Consider independent publishing.

Number one is not really an option. Number two is one that I know many writers have taken, and experienced success eventually. However, the thought of doing that right now feels incredibly depressing. Number three is the choice I’m leaning toward. I know other people who have had great success in self-publishing, and I’m hoping that I can do even a fraction as well as they have done.
This is not a process that I will undertake lightly. It’s going to require a lot of work. I already mentioned that I’m beginning work with an editor. At the same time, I’m writing a short story that will be available as a giveaway on this website and through a mailing list I’ll be starting soon. I will be looking into other marketing methods and deciding on the exact best course moving forward.
The voyage is changing courses, but the ultimate goal remains the same. Actual publication is now closer than it’s ever been, though not in the original fashion I desired. Please continue to follow me on this journey. I can promise some excitement to come…

I meant to make this blog post a couple weeks ago. Time got away from me.
Since my last post, I sent my query letter out to a small group of carefully selected literary agents. So far, in response, I received three form rejection letters, and two rejection letters that were only partially form. One of the form rejections set a new record by arriving less than 24 hours after I sent the query. Since most agents say their responses will usually take weeks, that’s… not encouraging.
The two not-quite-form letters each had at least one comment from the agents. And they contradicted each other. So… for now I can only ignore those comments unless/until I receive other comments that re-inforce one of them.
I said I’d give you all a look at my query, so here it is. For more on the details as to how this relates to the overall story, see the previous post.

Marshal’s entire life has been one of isolation and persecution. He wants nothing more than to escape the curse given to him by his father, one of the Lords who twisted the world’s magic to guard themselves against the consequences of their own selfish actions. But now a leprous assassin pursues him, sent by his half-brother Volraag. Volraag cares only about inheriting their father’s immense magical power, and Marshal stands in his way.

Meanwhile, Seri-Belit arrives at the Conclave of Mages determined to become the first and greatest female Master Mage. When she discovers a unique ability to see sources of magic, she realizes magic itself is unraveling, caused by the Lords like Marshal’s father. If magic unravels, cataclysm follows. But to fix it, Seri needs enough power to alter the laws of magic that have stood for centuries.

While Marshal desperately seeks to elude the assassin and find a way to lift his curse, Seri’s power grows exponentially. But it may not be enough. Volraag doesn’t just want his father’s power; he wants the power of all the Lords. To stop him, Marshal must escape his curse and claim his father’s power, while Seri must face Volraag himself. If they fail, Marshal will die, and Volraag’s power will tear the world apart.

UNTIL ALL CURSES ARE LIFTED is a 142,000-word adult epic fantasy that will appeal to readers who enjoy the works of Brandon Sanderson or Brent Weeks. This is a stand-alone with series potential.

And that’s it. Did that make you want to read the book? If so, let me know. If you have questions, let me know.
For now, the process continues. Will an agent be interested in this story? Stay tuned…

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been writing a query letter. And re-writing a query letter. Also, I re-wrote a query letter. Over and over and over.
I thought I had it down fairly well… and then I let an editor look at it. I had the help of the fantastic Haley Sulich (link) and we went back and forth for a while. Wow. Every time I got an email from her, I would dread it and be excited at the same time. Dread, because this meant she was going to point out something I did wrong, probably. And excitement, because every time we did this, the letter got stronger and more exciting.
A query letter is often described as being similar to what you would read on the back cover of a book. In other words, it gives a brief summary of some of the main plot elements and teases things just enough to make you want to read more. The goal is to convince a literary agent to want to read your manuscript.
However, the more I worked on this one, the more I realized that there’s a better comparison than back cover copy, and that is movie trailers.
Many times, a movie trailer will focus in on one specific aspect of an upcoming movie and play that up. The most obvious examples I’ve seen in the past weeks are the trailers for Ant-Man and the Wasp. While the trailers have focused heavily on the humor of the movie, at least one of them played up the concept of the villain Ghost. She’s portrayed as having incredible powers and Luis even says she wants to take over the world “or something.” Later on, a voice over mentions “saving the world” again. Clearly, this Ghost is terribly powerful and the entire movie revolves around stopping her.

Except it doesn’t. From what I understand, Ghost is a part of the story, but not the primary focus. In fact, several of the reviews have said there really isn’t a “villain,” per se, in this movie, at least not in the traditional sense. (Of course, this could be totally wrong; I haven’t seen it yet myself.) Some reviews don’t even mention her.
Yet by playing up the conflict with Ghost, the trailers will attract more viewers, especially those expecting standard superhero-style throw downs with a bad guy. It’s focusing on what those viewers want to see, even though there’s much more to the story.
I’ve written a 142,000 word epic fantasy. It has a lot going on. But my query can’t possibly begin to include all of the major events or even characters! And that’s okay. The query has to have a tight focus. In my case, it includes the two main protagonists and one main antagonist. A host of other characters and their stories aren’t even mentioned, including a second primary antagonist. If I included all of them, it wouldn’t be a query any more, it would be a synopsis (and that’s a whole other hassle).
I’m on a fascinating journey here, through the whims of the publishing process. I’ll keep you all updated via this blog. Next time, I’ll let you get a glimpse at the final query and let you know a little more about this particular novel.

I’ve written two other blog posts over the past couple of weeks and deleted both of them. One came across as too depressing, and the other just didn’t work. Maybe I can get this one actually on the web.
Currently, I’m deep into editing my novel. After making a lengthy list of revision notes, I did one pass to correct/change all of those. Then I searched out all passive voice and killed it (well, most of it). I also did work on limiting adverbs and other boring stuff that you probably don’t care about.
After doing enough work to proclaim that I was on the second draft, I printed the entire thing out. I’ve been going through it, sentence-by-sentence, and making more edits. Looking at it on paper provides a different perspective than my computer screen. At the same time, I’ve made another list of revision notes to go through. 
Meanwhile, I got a lot of feedback from a beta reader. And I mean a LOT. Two hours and thirteen minutes worth. And 99% of it was good.
Now, if someone is willing to rave about your book for two hours and thirteen minutes, then maybe, just maybe you have something there. He told me I had to write the next book, even if I don’t get published, because he needs to know what happens next.
Yet I can’t help but feel wary of too much praise. I’ve been there before, only to see failure. I’m cautious that way. After all, I have another reader who has had the book longer and has only gotten through about 50 pages. Sure, it could be that he’s a slower reader. Or maybe it only appeals to a certain type of person, like the raving reader.
At any rate, I have a plan now, mostly. I need to finish my edit of the printed version, and make all the corrections I find there. Then I need to finish the new revisions list. By then, maybe the final beta reader will have more feedback for me.
Meanwhile, I need to start working on a query letter. This one’s hard, as the plot is harder to communicate, more involved than my previous book. 
If that weren’t enough, I’ve also outlined and plotted a short story set within the world of this book. Perhaps I’ll finish that at the same time, and use it for additional promotion.
I have a lot of work to do.
 
Funniest moment from the beta reader conversation: he’s comparing characters and talking about where they might end up, speculating… and I couldn’t help but say: “Are you… shipping my characters?”
(He was.)

Around a year and a half ago, when I decided to get back into writing, I looked for some advice online. Guess what? The internet is full of advice about writing. In just a couple of days, I had 20+ websites bookmarked and kept finding more. I haven’t spent a lot of time looking for advice on other topics, but the sheer quantity of writing advice online is almost unbelievable. It seems that everyone and their cousin’s neighbor has something to say on the topic.
However, like anything in life, I soon discovered that you need to be careful about writing advice. Some of it is not necessarily beneficial. This applies to any topic, of course, but I found it especially true with regard to writing. Sometimes, that cousin’s neighbor doesn’t know what she’s talking about.
I’m not going to dispense my own writing advice, though I’ve thought about it. I don’t feel qualified. I’m mostly writing about my own experiences. And from time to time, I may throw out my own opinions about something I’ve read. But that’s all it is: my opinions. I have no great wealth of knowledge to give out… yet. Maybe someday I will.
You see, that’s one of the key things I discovered about the writing advice online. Some of it is written by people who have no business giving out advice. I’ve seen websites filled to overflowing with advice, and yet the writer of this advice has never published a single book. Others have even larger sites with even more advice, yet they’ve only self-published a couple of titles on Amazon. Then there’s some that have only written books (sometimes self-published) that are ABOUT writing, but they’ve never written anything else. Perplexing. The ones that make me really roll my eyes are the sites that look like they were designed in 1992 and never updated since. I saw one that said something about “this month’s focus is…” and the topic hasn’t changed since I discovered it.
My point is that we should use discernment in choosing where we get advice. Some people are doing this just to make money off of gullible wannabe authors. Some are doing it because they think they know more than they actually do.
Let’s use a ridiculous example. I work on a Mac computer. If I start having problems with it, where should I go for advice? Should I ask my neighbor, who almost never touches a computer, from what I’ve seen? Should I ask my friend who hates Macs and insists that Windows is far superior? Should I ask another friend who used to use Macs back in the 1990s, but now swears by Linux? Or should I ask a genius at the Apple Store? The answer should be obvious. Why listen to advice from people who don’t know what they’re talking about?
That’s where I come down. When I seek out advice, I want the best advice. Some choices are obvious, like Writer’s Digest, which has been a standard for all things writing for close to a century. Then there are legitimate best-selling writers who are willing to give out advice and share their experiences. No one can question Brandon Sanderson’s success, for example. He regularly teams up with a couple of other authors to produce a short podcast on writing topics. It’s been going on several years and is full of great advice. I’m a big fan of David Farland’s writing tips (he’s also a best-selling author), and James Scott Bell, who is extremely prolific, has also written some helpful books on writing.
Since publishing is an industry, sometimes advice can come from non-authors; it can come from those involved in the business side of it. Agents are a good source of advice on how to get noticed. Query Shark, run by an agent who gleefully rips writer queries to shreds and then shows how they can be better. It makes me laugh, but has definitely improved my query game. John Adamus is an editor/writing coach who has been in the business for decades. Besides his blog, and his paid services, he dispenses free advice on Twitter daily. Jane Friedman is an editor that has over 20 years of experience in the publishing industry and a website chock-full of brilliant tips. And so on.
Writing is an art. Publishing is a business. Seeking out advice on both sides of the issue is a good idea. Just make sure you’re getting advice from people who have your best interests in mind.

I said that in my last post, but I thought I’d elaborate a little more.
Since I finished the first draft of the book, here’s some of what I’ve been up to:

• Adding in an important scene that I accidentally left out.
• Adjusting the timeline of different events as they happen from different points of view.
• Added a few comments to clarify certain side issues related to character development.
• Searched for filler words – that means searching out every single use of words like “that” or “just” and deleting most of them.
• Killing adverbs. Too often, in the hurry of writing, we tend to rely on words like “actually” or “really.” I needed to delete and/or rewrite a few hundred of those. That was probably the biggest job I’ve taken on so far.
• Checked for consistent capitalization of certain world-specific terms.
• Checked to see if I ever mentioned a certain supporting character’s appearance (I didn’t! Whoops!)

I haven’t even scratched the surface of the list of revisions that I know I need to make. That includes minutiae like determine the phases of the moon through the story’s progress and making sure any references to it make sense. Or enhancing descriptions of certain parts of the culture. Or adding in more foreshadowing for the events of the climax.
After I take care of ALL of those things, then I’ll start from the very beginning and re-read the entire thing, sentence-by-sentence, and revise everything. Yes, that’s a big deal.
I have two beta readers who are reading the rough draft, and I’m looking forward to their reactions. They’re very different from each other, so I expect different points of view, which is what I want to hear. Then I’ll make more changes based on their feedback.
Only after all of that will I seek out some more beta readers/critique partners to look over the revised draft.
Part of me hates this process. It’s an insane amount of work and a lot of it is downright mind-numbing. But another part of me loves it.
You see, I love this story and these characters. Therefore, I want it to be the best it can be. I want it to flow, to sweep the reader along, to make it into a real page-turner. Each and every sentence has to be just right. Each and every character’s words, raised eyebrows, gestures, frowns, has to be true to who they are. Each and every description has to be realistic and appropriate to the setting.
I tried to think of an analogy that would work here, but every one of them fell apart. I don’t think I have anything at all that works as a comparison for this editing/re-writing process. It’s an art form.
And it takes a while.